The Problem Is Big

1 Peter 5:8 tells us to “be alert” because the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. There are many things that Satan uses to cause us to stumble and fall, but what I am seeing in our modern times is truly frightening.

We have all heard the story of the frog that gets put into a room-temperature pot of water and is allowed to hang out for a while, but then the burner on the stove is turned on and the water slowly starts getting warmer and warmer until it is hot and boiling. The frog never realized that the water was becoming dangerous because the temperature was rising very slowly and the frog was getting used to it until it was too late and he was boiled to death. Much like the frog in the pot our culture is getting more and more acclimated to sexual immorality and is headed for disaster without even realizing it. We are bombarded daily with “non-pornographic” pictures and scenes from TV shows, movies, the internet, magazines, billboards and even on the back of buses that we happen to be driving behind, that drag our minds into the gutters of immorality and it slowly desensitizes us to the death trap we are caught in. The more we see those erotic pictures and scenes, even though the people are not fully disrobed, it slowly erodes our conscience to the point that it’s acceptable when we do start to see some uncovered body parts, which leads us down the road toward being accepting of pornography and from there we fall into its trap. It’s clear to see how Satan is using sexual immorality to erode our culture because it is almost everywhere that we look. But the truly frightening part I mentioned in the first paragraph is the area where it is harder to see; it’s a place where it is easy to hide the ugliness of that particular sin because it’s just not spoken of there, and that place is the Church. I am witnessing first-hand the destruction of Pastors and ministry leaders because of things like pornography, affairs and other forms of sexual immorality and it’s truly heartbreaking because it is avoidable.

It hits home for me because I was on the worship team at my church for years and every Sunday I would get up in front of the congregation and lead people in worship while unbeknownst to them, I had just spent the week captivated by an addiction to pornography. I knew it was wrong but I was so scared and ashamed to say anything about it because I didn’t want people knowing I struggled with that sin, but I also knew that I would lose my position as a worship leader and quite possibly, my wife and kids, friends and membership in my church. Satan is using the secrecy of sexual sin to destroy the Church from the inside out starting with the leaders. They continue on in silence while Satan uses their sin to erode the ministry and eventually destroy it through one of the leaders getting publicly busted, which gives unbelievers another excuse to talk about the hypocrisy of Christians. But what I did not know was that there were plenty of men in my church that were struggling with that same sin and if I would have just reached out to my friends and confessed my own struggle, it could have started a revival in that church where men would come forward and find freedom and healing from sexual sin and become the men, husbands and dads that God truly wanted them to be! About 3 years after I left that church, the Senior Pastor was caught in an adulterous relationship with one of the women in the congregation. To this day it weighs heavy on my heart that I did not confess my own sin before I was busted, and started a purity ministry for other men who were struggling in that church. But as I have been working with other churches over the last few years and have seen the statistics of men who struggle with pornography in the church (68% of men in Evangelical churches have looked at porn over the last 30 days) I can clearly see that I was not alone when I thought I was and that this is truly en epidemic right under our own noses in the Church, let alone out in the secular world.

If you are a leader in a Church or other ministry and are reading this, chances are very high that you are struggling or have struggled with some form of sexual immorality, in particular pornography. If that is the case, there is absolutely help for you and you need to take it- now! In my posts I hope to deliver resources that are applicable to everyone struggling with some form of sexual temptation or addiction but I want to especially provide resources and encouragement for ministry leaders. I’ve been there. I have gone through the long process of recovery from my sexual addiction and it’s a constant battle to stay pure and continue keeping my eyes where they should be, but it can be done! God’s word is full of truths that can help you in this battle. Please reach out if you are needing help. You can find your freedom in Christ and it can start today. Stand FIRM and let NOTHING move you. 1 Corinthians 15:58.

17 thoughts on “The Problem Is Big”

  1. This problem is HUGE and you are not at all alone. It damages the Church. It damages marriages and families. We Christians must admit that we all have temptations. We need to acknowledge the struggles and make no temptation off limits. Establishing safe environments that allow people to stand up and say, ” Here’s my problem” is what confessing our sins to one another is.

    Thanks for speaking up! God bless!


  2. Thank you for sharing your thoughts with us. Acknowledging a problem and taking it to God can be a blessing. We all have areas where we fail. We are blessed to have His forgiveness, if we only ask.


  3. Amen! I was addicted to porn and masturbation in the past, but ever since I knew that I am totally forgiven and there is no condemnation in Christ, the habit started to fade. As I spent lots of time in God’s word, captivated by His goodness, majestic and power, etc, the addiction just dropped off. I am porn-free and I don’t masturbate anymore. Praise the Lord!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Amen Milton! I would highly encourage you to find a Conquer Series group to join and go through. I have seen many guys find the addiction drop off but then something triggers them or the enemy uses a wound from the past that has not been addressed and healed and they fall into it again. PTL that you have found sobriety! God’s doing a great work in you.


  4. Thanks for your brutal honesty in your post. Society keeps telling us that what we do in our home and on our own time is acceptable when it is not. So many issues, like pornography are destroying families and churches. We need more open discussion. God bless.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Yvonne. Satan is counting on us keeping it quiet, but we need more people (including women!!) to come forward and admit to what the enemy has been using to keep them in secret bondage.

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Thank you, Paul, for sharing your view on modern culture. I agree with you; the frog-analogy is an accurate description of what’s happening. All of this affects us, although it’s pushed upon us without our consent.

    I don’t think you’re alone with this, and it’s great that someone dares to speak openly about it.

    God bless you and your ministry!
    Edna Davidsen

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks for the encouragement Edna! It is definitely pushed upon us whether we want it to be or not. It’s for that reason that we all need ot remain vigilant; especially after it’s been an addiction for us! It’s so easy to fall into it again.


  6. Thank you so much, Paul for your transparency and for your ministry for those caught in this addiction. You are right, our culture is like the frog boiling in the pot.

    I think the group of people I worry about the most are the children of our culture. Sexual immorality is so prevalent in our society, that children are growing up thinking this way of life is normal. It saddens my heart greatly.

    Secondly, I am concerned about our church leaders. I was a Children’s Minister and I saw first hand the stress our church leaders/pastors were under. They are expected to be popular, everyone’s savior, and grow the church. They do so much and have very little time for respite and family. I don’t believe God intended for man to carry so much glory. We were created to reflect God’s glory, not absorb it. Too many are trying to be ‘god’ and they don’t realize it. The stress is so much that they try to cope by escaping into unhealthy sinful practices.

    Great post! A very needed message! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. VERY good words Marcie! Thanks for the well said and thought out response. You are very right in everything you said. I am only 43 and this world is radically different for my kids than it was for me. Everything is SO accessible and hard to monitor. We need ot pray for our kids, grand-kids and leaders often!

      Liked by 1 person

  7. So thankful to read a post that speaks so honestly to something that definitely needs to be addressed and talked about. When sins are brought out into the open, when people can be vulnerable and say that they are struggling, that is when the Lord can bring healing and restoration, as people can start praying with us and holding us accountable, and we can start fighting it in community of other believers. Thank you for sharing this!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Tessa. Sin certainly does thrive in the darkness, so bringing it out into the light is critical. Thanks for your kind words and anywhere you can share the post would be awesome so other people who are struggling can find some hope. Blessings!


  8. Thank you for writing this. I have been telling everyone that their story matters, and so many people have come to me with a story similar to this. I think the Devil brings the feeling of shame as much as he brings on sinful acts itself because he knows shame will try to stop people from being free. Thank you for sharing your story. You never know whose life you may change for the better by being so open and transparent.

    Your story matters.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks so much Jessie! I am looking forward to checking out your blog as well. I always say that I hate the components of my story, but I love seeing how God is using them to help others find freedom and for HIS glory!



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